Saturday, December 29, 2012

Google Adwords Chagrin

The promise of Google Adwords, the access to billions in advertising development, delivery and analysis is one of the more important developments of the world wide web, within the narrow benefit of the internet, which is it only lowered cost and widened access to communication and research.

Advertising is a form of communication, and is best when it is back and forth.  With Google Adwords, you can link the ad all the way through to a paid transaction, so you can know exactly what you are getting for you ad dollars.

Next, you can tinker with the ad itself, keywords, pitch, execution, etc which is the other part of ad management.

Proof and testing pitch are the two bugaboos in advertising, and highlighting those is what made the career of David Ogilvy, the model for the TV series MadMen.  Back then to test and ad he insisted everyone be "keyed" and carry a coupon.  The coupon redemption proves the reach of the ad, and allows you to follow from ad to sales transaction.  What?!  Sheer madness.  How can you advertise Rolls Royce and offer a coupon.  In that instance, the coupon was for a free book and test drive redeemable at the dealer.

But still, you'd have to blow through a million bucks before you found out your ad copy was no good.

But with GoogleAds you can test with a mere few hundred dollars max, and learn what you need to know.  And you can target and test down to a neighborhood!  Billions in advertising capability, accessible by the start-up.

Except it is not true.  It truly is all there, but as a practical matter it is unusable.  For whatever reason, I and countless others I've spoken to say they cannot get it to work.  It is simply not possible to create an ad, post it test it and tweak it.  The process required is so counter-intuitive and perplexing, and the learning curve so steep, that we all just give up.

Google does have hapless telephone customer service people who will walk you through the jungle of the adwords site.  Sure, spend an hour getting one step of fifty sorted out.  But word to Google: one advantage of the internet is to code sites well enough so you do not need human intervention.  Is this news to you?

Of course this may be a error on my part of the narrow basis of comparison.  Just because I and everyone I know cannot make it work does not mean the rest of the world cannot.  But, if AdWords worked well you'd see not just one video of a success story at the GoogleAds site, you'd see "GoogleAds: 100,000 small businesses, One billion in advertising budgets, 220 billion in sales" or some such.

Now, there is an army of people, who for about $1500 above ad budget, will run a GoogleAds campaign for you.  They tend to all say the same thing, that payback is some six months later, after your campaign is fine tuned.  Really?  Will you guarantee it?

No!   Why not?  I've consulted on the basis "if I do not increase your sales, don't pay me."  I've taught seminars on the basis of "if you are not happy with the seminar, don't pay me."  Every waiter in the world works on the basis of "if you are not happy with me, don't pay me."  Why is advertising exempt?

My guess is the game is to line up clients, pick up about $10,000 a head plus kickbacks from Google on the ad spending, and then when the client is ticked off for noon performance, move on.  If you run through 100 clients a year, you are bound to have a couple of successes, which you can highlight as success stories and references.

Why does Google tolerate this?  Why have they not made GoogleAds user friendly?   Maybe because advertising is a lot harder than it looks.  Maybe having the agency model retailing and Google wholesaling is better revenue?  Who knows?

Two things:  If you are going to be in business, buy and read and re-read Ogilvy on Advertising.  He eill make you a good consumer of advertising services.

Next, I'd like to hear from people, and I'll list them, how much you spent on google ads, and what was your return?  Time and money.  $2000, 20 hours, and $400 in revenue?  Something like that.

If GoogleAds does not work, this will encourage others to enter the market with something that does work, like toogle once Trounced Yahoo.

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