Nursing Homes

A few years back Cruise lines announced they were interested in booking our elderly at cheap rates on cruise ships. A friend sends me this on booking into Holiday Inn:

In light of the ongoing ?debate? about Pres Obamas proposed threat to
take over Healthcare with his "Public Option", perhaps we should consider
this option:

No nursing home for us. We are checking into the Holiday Inn!
With the average cost for a nursing home care costing $188.00 per day,
there is a better way when we get old & feeble.
We have already checked on reservations at the Holiday Inn. For a combined
long term stay discount and senior discount, it's $49.23 per night.

That leaves $138.77 a day for: Breakfast, lunch and dinner in any
restaurant we want, or room service, laundry, gratuities and special TV movies.
Plus, they provide a swimming pool, a workout room, a lounge and
washer-dryer, etc. Most have free toothpaste and razors, and all have free
shampoo and soap.

$10 worth of tips a day will have the entire staff scrambling to help
you. They treat you like a customer, not a patient.
There is a city bus stop out front, and seniors ride free. The handicap
bus will also pick you up (if you fake a decent limp).


To meet other nice people, call a church bus on Sundays.

For a change of scenery, take the airport shuttle bus and eat at one of
the nice restaurants there. While you're at the airport, fly somewhere.
Otherwise, the cash keeps building up.

It takes months to get into decent nursing homes. Holiday Inn will take
your reservation today. And you are not stuck in one place forever, you
can move from Inn to Inn, or even from city to city. Want to see Hawaii ?
They have a Holiday Inn there too.
TV broken? Light bulbs need changing? Need a mattress replaced? No
problem. They fix everything, and apologize for the inconvenience.

The Inn has a night security person and daily room service. The maid
checks to see if you are ok. If not, they will call the undertaker or an
ambulance. If you fall and break a hip, Medicare will pay for the hip, and
Holiday Inn will upgrade you to a suite for the rest of your life.

And no worries about visits from family. They will always be glad to
find you, and probably check in for a few days mini-vacation.

The grand kids can use the pool.
What more can you ask for?

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